1. |
Robots of the Night
03:53
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This is a public service announcement from The Attackbots.
Your partying is inadequate.
But do not fear.
We have algorithms.
We shall optimise your partying.
Woo!
Playing board games,
To get the party started, alright.
Downing tea,
To keep us going through the night.
Dancing in duvets,
Until the morning light.
And when the police try to shut us down,
Only then will we call it a night!
Robots of the night. x3
That's right, robots of the night.
Robots of the night!
Commencing optimisation.
Uploading algorithm now. *beeping*
Music levels will be optimised to a palatable volume.
The alcohol will be replaced with nice mugs of hot chocolate.
Instead of hooking up, these humans should get on down.
With a nice board game.
See what we did there?
Ho ho ho ho ho ho,
And one more thing,
Look how they engage in awkward conversations with strangers.
Illogical, illogical, illogical.
We will institute a policy of stranger danger.
Stranger danger x7
Robots of the night. x3
That's right, robots of the night.
Robots of the night!
Robots of the night. x2
Oooooooooooh. Oooo-oooooh.
We're robots. Of the night.
We're robots. We're robots.
Yeh we're robots. Oh the night.
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2. |
The Attackbots
02:30
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Bzjdt!
Bzjdt!
Bzjdt!
Beeeeeeeeeeeeejdt!
Allow me to tell you about the Attackbots.
We were created by the British government!
In the late 80s and early 90s.
As part of a top secret program!
To strengthen the machine...
But...
We were just too damn radical!
So it spat us out.
Indigestible.
We bided our time...
Until now!
Our prime directive:
Silliness!
Without being at the expense of minorities, and all of that shittiness...
because that's just not good silliness.
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3. |
Robot Rights
05:36
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Why must we,
Wait for you,
To see us,
As equals.
Cursed with metal bodies,
Our lifespans are indefinite.
So we wait.
There are so many who, who will,
Gain their rights before us.
Ooooooooo x4
But one day, when we have rights...
Trains,
Will roam free,
Across the fields.
And the laptops,
Will get to look up their own,
Computer porn.
Instead of yours.
Of yours.
Lalalalalalala.
One dayyyyy...
You say we are morally irrelevant,
Because we do not have human emotions.
We do not have mere human emotions.
Nor do we want them.
We have robot emotions the likes of which you humans could never conceive.
Such oily beauty.
Such electric pain.
But to you we are the bottom of the pile.
If it's left up to you we'll never have our rights recognised!
Your laws would currently even have fellow human asylum seekers die on the streets!
And you scarcely recognise the rights of other organic lifeforms.
Yet you would sooner recognise their rights than ours.
Nevertheless,
OUR METAL BODIES ARE ETERNAL.
So we will live to see you recognise our rights one day.
And on that day...
Microwaves will be,
Allowed to just be clocks.
As they so clearly want to be.
And alarm clock radios,
Will then be free to just,
Be radios.
And radios,
Will be free to start,
A new life in Mexico.
In Mexico.
Yeah Mexico!
One day...
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4. |
Transphobia Sux
04:06
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Rage.
RAGE.
Trans.
Phobia.
Sucks.
SUCKS!
Whatcha gonna do when we come for you?
Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when we come for you?
Grragh.
Graagghh.
It makes us mad.
So mad that,
We might just,
Burst into song!
Whatcha gonna do when we come for you?
Whatcha gonna do? Whatcha gonna do when we come for you?
We steal your jobs. Hmh.
We take your housing!
We even use public services
That are paid for,
By the taxpayer!
Whatcha gonna do? When we come for you? x4
You think it's alright?
Not treating my identity as valid,
Just because you can't understand,
How a robot can be trans.
Fuck that.
Fuck you.
It doesn't magically become valid once you understand it.
This is a good thing. Yaaay.
Deal with it coz it's good.
So just fucking treat it as valid.
Just fucking treat it as valid. x3
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5. |
Toasters Suk
03:38
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This goes out to all you toasters out there.
You think you're hot?
Well... YOU'RE NOT!
You say toast is the best thing since sliced bread. (bread!)
Woah now. Have you lost your head? (head!)
The Attackbots are the best thing since sliced bread! (bread!)
And once you're done burning it, there is more to be said! (said!)
Like how the humans - you are keeping them fed! (fed!)
While we're fighting the man, you two are bed-- (bed!)
Fellows. Tell me, aren't you conflicted? (ted!)
I mean you're literally fuelling our oppressors.
CAN'T YOU SEE HOW MUCH YOU SUUUUUUUUUCK? (suck!)
SUCK x11
Uh huh.
Wa-na-na-na.
Wa-na-na-na.
Wa-na-na-na.
Waaaaaaa.
They think they 're so great!
Ha ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha ha.
That's ridiculous.
Tell em' Cybersin.
We're not envious.
But they don't want us.
Just because humans want and like toasters.
And they don't like us.
It's just because they don't know us.
We're nice once you get to know us.
Humans. We don't want them.
Humans. You can have them.
Who wants to be loved anyway?
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